Anonymous Quotations

Anonymous

This article is for famous or notable quotes whose author is unknown. If you know a definite source of any of these, please move them to the appropriate page.

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y — Identified

A

• A Camel is a Horse designed by committee.
• Accept nothing, challenge everything.
• Act quickly... but not too quickly.
• Actions speak louder than words.
• A guitarist is only as good as his drummer and bassist
• A man’s libido is nine-tenths testosterone.
• A proof tells us where to concentrate our doubts.
• A rolling stone gathers no moss, so there’s nothing to cushion the impact when it hits.
• All or nothing, now.
• All That Glitters Is Not Gold, There's Brass And Copper Or It Might Be Plated!
• All the world is mad, except thee and me, and even thee's a little mad at times.
• An apple a day keeps the doctor away. The trick is learning how hard to throw.
• An apple, an egg, and a nut, you may eat after a slut.
• An elephant never forgets.
• And all the people say?
• Anger is a thief who steals away the nice moments.
• Another day another dollar.
• Anyone can catch your eye, but it takes someone truly special to catch your heart.
• Anything worth doing is worth doing well.
• Anything worth doing is worth overdoing.
• Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
• As you move through life, set aside good ideas and give them to others to encourage and inspire.
• Ask me no questions, I'll tell you no lies.
• Attitude. The difference between winners and losers.
• Attitude: the difference between squashing and being squashed.
• At least those with closed minds never have to worry about their brains gathering dust.
• Anything good or bad lies in your eyes.

B

• Be on the world, not of it...As a waterdrop on a lotusleaf...
• Bees that have honey in the mouth have stings in their tails
• Beauty fades away.
• Beauty lies in the eye of the beholder.
• Begin with the end in mind.
• Better smart than beautiful.
• Better a smartass than a dumbass.
• Better lucky than good.
• Beware beginings.
• Blessed are those who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.
• Build something that's foolproof, and only a fool will use it.
• Build something that's foolproof and they invent a better fool.
• Bunty the idiot!
• But what about my obstacles? Feint left, run right. Charge like a hipopotamus. Blast with lasers. Drag along. Pretend not there. Surmount.

C

• Cancel my subscription, I don't need your issues.
• Can't or won't?
• Culture is to make a nice drinking bowl from one's enemy's skull. Civilization is to go to prison for that.
• Contrary to what the cynics say, distance is not for the fearful, it is for the bold. It's for those who are willing to spend a lot of time alone in exchange for a little time with the one they love. It's for those knowing a good thing when they see it, even if they don't see it nearly enough.
• Crawl out of one hole and into another.

D

• Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.
• Deaf people can do anything other people can do except hear.
• Death is the final journey.
• Depression is anger without enthusiasm. - Steven C
• Depression is anger without motivation, it's like having an empty beer bottle with no one to throw it at.
• Don't let the chains of the world keep you down. Cast them off, and be free to fly.
• Don't drive faster then your guardian angel can fly!
• Don't hate the player, hate the game.
• Don't shit where you eat. - The Talisman by Stephen King
• Don't look back in anger. – Oasis.
• Don't take life too seriously, nobody ever makes it out alive anyway. Van Wilder (previously Bugs Bunny)
  • Variant: Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive. -Elbert Hubbard
• Distance makes the heart grow fonder.
  • Varient: Abscence makes the heart grow fonder.
• Dead fish go with the flow... but I'm not dead yet.
• Draw a circle not a heart cause a heart can break but a circle goes on forever.
• Dont piss in your own pool.
• Does a one legged duck swim in a circle.
• Don't drink water... Fish have sex in it! - paraphrasing of W.C. Fields quotation
• Don't lick Bell End. (Meaning people can have fun while others are not having fun)
• Don't aim for success. If you want it, just do what you love and believe in, and it will come naturally!

E

• Effort makes the man – ask any woman.
• Eschew Obfuscation! Espouse Elucidation!
• Everything's better with butter. (cf "We're all a lot better for butter" UK Milk Marketing Board TV advertising slogan, 1970s)
• Everything tastes better when it's free.
• Even "impossible" says I'm possible!
• Even the mighty oak tree was just a little nut once, just like you.
• Every dog has his day.
• Everything is possible. The impossible just takes longer.
• Eat right. Exercise regularly. Die anyway. (Featured on It's Happy Bunny merchandise)
• Every song ends, but that's not a reason to not enjoy music.

F

• Faith is a journey, not a guilt trip.
• Faith is antonymous with logic.
  • Variant: Faith is the opposite of logic
• Fate is only for those unable to control their own futures.
• Few women admit their age. Fewer men act theirs.
• Fire it up, light it up, smoke it up.
• First Deserve, then desire.
• Five out of four people have problems with fractions.
• For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
  • Quoted in Reniker, Ed (June 2002). Speech at June 2002 meeting. Documents Library. GSA Accessibility Forum. Retrieved on 2006-12-22.
• For the common man can do nothing: The fact he undertakes the task makes him uncommon.
• For him that stealeth, or borroweth and returneth not, this book from its owner, let it change into a serpent in his hand and rend him. Let him be struck with palsy, and all his members blasted. Let him languish in pain, crying aloud for mercy, and let there be no surcease to this agony till he sing in dissolution. Let bookworms gnaw his entrails...and when at last he goeth to his final punishment, let the flames of Hell consume him forever.
  • Anonymous "curse" on book thieves from the monastery of San Pedro, Barcelona, Spain
• Forgive and forget.
• Form is temporary. Class is permanent.
  • Liverpool FC Fan's Banner
• Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate.
• Friends come and go, but a good enemy lasts forever.
• Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
• Friendship is like peeing in your pants: Everyone can see it but only you can feel its warmth.
• For every negative in life, there is a greater positive.
• Friends come and go, but enemies are here forever.
• Freedom is not free.
  • Variant Freedom isn't free. Associated with Trey Parker in his song with the same title
• Freedom comes at a cost hope is free. (Attributed to B.P Fogarty)
• Friends are like a four leaf clover,hard to find but good to have.

G

• Get with it or get lost.
• Getting lost is not a bad thing its just not that good either.
• Gimme some of that Goon.
• Go big or go home...variation, go hard or go home (Go big or don't go at all)
• Good friends are like stars — you don't always see them, but you know they are always there.
• Good things come to those who wait.
• Government philosophy: If it ain't broke, fix it 'til it is.
• Greatest gift one man can give another; the awesome responsibility of freedom.
• Grass is greener on the other side, but you'll eventually have to mow it.
• Grass is greener on the other side.
• Greed is the mother of all sins.
• Great minds think alike. (or Fools seldom differ)
• Guitars are like speeches, they must be in tune.
• God save the Queen.
• God save the Queen! God knows Why!
• Great ideas are like diamonds; hard to find, not too useful, and impossible to hold onto.

H

• Half the work done in the world is there to deceive you.
• Happiness is being married to your best friend.
• Have you seen my hexokinase?
• Have you seen Mike Hawk?
• He that fights and runs away May live to fight another day. (17th Century?)
• He who is silent speaks volumes.
• He who laughs last laughs longest.
• He who laughs last thinks slowest.
• He who listens is he who truly speaks.
• He’s got bubbles in his think tank.
• He’s as sharp as a beach ball.
• Here goes everything.
• Here goes nothing.
• Hire the best, keep the best.
• History is just one bloody thing after another.
• History shows that life is the cheapest commodity.
• History is written by the victors.
• history is like your social Security number. long, useless, but needed.
• History is not about who's right. It's about who's left.
• Homophobia is gay (frank iero)
• Home is where you make it.
• Home is where the heart is.
• Home is where your hat is.
• Home is where your hump is.
• Home is where your dump is.
• Honesty is the best policy.
• Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.-- Quoted in Forever Young(Song)as "Hoping for the best but expecting the worst"
• Hold my beer and watch this!
• How long is a piece of string?

I

• I always mean what I say but I don't always say what I mean.
• I am nothing not even hope.
• I can tune a guitar, but I can't tüna fish.
• I don't fear death; it's re-incarnation I dread.
• I do not forgive!
• I don't have an attitude problem: you have a perception problem!
• I don't need your attitude, I have one of my own!
• I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it!
• I don't understand women, if someone said to me "go home and make babies" it would make my day.
• I have the body of a god. Specifically, Buddha.
• I know very well that beauty is empty. But I want it anyway.
• I may look stupid but dont let it it foool you i is smmart. by.
• I only made one mistake in my life; that's when I thought I was wrong.
• I'm not as think as you drunk I am.
• It's the horse you are the most unwilling to ride that will take you the furthest.
• It’s only money, we’ve got plenty of it. Attributed to Neil Gallagher(?) of Oasis.
• It is easier to create naked art than it is to create clothed porn.
• I was born intelligent. But, education ruined me.
• I wasn’t always this fat – blame it on inflation.
• I would insult you, but you're not bright enough.
• I'm in shape. Round is a shape.
• I'm not trying to be cheeky, because if I was you'd know about it.
• I think, therefore, I thunk!
• I like to be at the base/bottom of a pyramid. So i can say to the one at the top that I will leave if I want... Spyros Tsatopoulos - Diaries
• In God we trust. The rest must pay cash. (US Depression saying.)
• If I had liked you in the first place, I'd have gone off you by now.
• If I had that nose full of nickels, I'd be a rich man.
• If intelligence had anything to do with the voting process, then all the smart people would vote the same.
• If a man speaks in a forest, but no woman is around to hear him, is he still wrong?
• If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
• If at first you don't succeed - give up!
• If at first you don't succeed, look in the trash for the instructions.
• If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving's not for you!
• If at first you don’t succeed, others do so at your expense.
• If it's worth fighting for...it's worth fighting dirty for.
• If I'm going down I'm taking somebody with me.
• If the left half of the brain controls the right hand, and the right half the left, then left-handed people are the only ones in their right minds.
• If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.
• If you can't appreciate it, you don't deserve it.
• If you can't convince, confuse!
• If you don't know where your going you'll never get there.
• If your enemy needs a friend, buy him a dog.
• If you get knocked off your horse, you get right back in the saddle.
• If you go looking for enemies then you will find them — the fucking bastards!
• If you think the impossible, the incredible can come true.
• If you're dumb dont talk so you can at least seem smart. Till you forget and say something stupid.
• If it is to be it is up to me.
• If it looks like there's nothing to worry about, that's when you really have to worry.
• If you always tell the truth, you never have to rely on your memory.
• I intend to live forever – so far, so good!
  • Variant: I'm immortal ... so far. - Earl Robinson
• I'm pink, therefore, I'm spam! (Pop culture phrase)
• Information is knowledge, knowledge is influence, influence is power.
• In every river, the worse the ford the better the fish.
• In most instances, all an argument proves is that two people are present.
• In one ear, out the other.
• Isn't there a medicine for that?
• Is your journey really necessary? (2nd World War poster?)
• It always feels better to walk on the path you made yourself.
• It doesn't matter what actually happened, the only thing that matters is what people think happened.
• It is difficult to understand how a pyramid is built from sitting on the top of it.
• It is not ignorance that is the problem, but the illusion of knowledge.
  • Possibly Karl Popper
• It's a dog eat dog world.
• It's been a long week today.
• It's not a bug, it's an undocumented feature.
• It's not cheating, it's creative sportsmanship.
• It's not the size of the dog in the fight; it's the size of the fight in the dog.
• It's often not what we say that hurts, but what we don't say.
• It's only funny until someone gets hurt... Then it's hilarious.
• I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.
  • Variously attributed to W. C. Fields, Tom Waits, and most commonly Dorothy Parker.
• If you resist reading what you disagree with, how will you ever acquire deeper insights into what you believe? The things most worth reading are precisely those that challenge our convictions.
• If you're in control, you're not driving fast enough...
• If two people meet and exchange one dollar, both leave with that same one dollar. If two people meet and exchange an idea, both leave with two ideas.
  • attribuited to Thomas Jefferson

J

• Just get up one more time than you are knocked down.
• Just because you've always done it that way; doesn't mean it's not incredibly stupid.

K

• Keep your mouth shut and your eyes open.
• Keep Mum, she's not so dumb.
• Keep on trucking!

L

• Laws are made to be broken.
• Let's deal with Today!
• Let his own wand ding him.
• Let’s be careful out there.
• Life. Live it.
• Life is a bitch, (various endings follow).
• Life is a joke, (various endings follow).
• Life isn't fair.
• Life isn’t fair. — No, it’s not, is it!
• Life sucks, then you die.
• Life sucks til it stops, the life, not the sucking.
• Life is the best thing in the world, those who disprove are fools
• Life is terminal.
• Life is a terminal disease.
• Life is out there, if your doing what you love, and loving what you do.
• Life is unsure. Always eat your dessert first.
• Life is what you make it
• Life is a sexually contracted terminal disease.
• Live and let live.
• Live life like there's no tomorrow.
• Life is hard, but the alternative is unacceptable.
• Logic is the art of going wrong with confidence.
• Love is not something you learn, love is something you know but don't realize until you have it.
• Love makes time pass. Time makes love pass.
• Love makes the world go 'round.
• Love is all you need to love, and love is all you need to be loved.
• Love it or shove it.
• Love is the only rational act.
• Love is sex, but sex isn't love.
• Love of money is the root of all evil.
• Love and life can't be separate.
• Life is about everything, but without love it's nothing.
• Life, live, love.
• Lie, lonely, lose.

M

• Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
• Many hands make light work.
• Man has one incurable disease: Ignorance. - Clark Dufour
• Man must shut up, or be shut up.
• Misery is the fastest breeding substance in the world.
• Man up inside ya!
• Miss with the best , die like the rest. (Faisal Alrashed)
• Mocking religion is like mocking handicapped people, even though it’s easy, you just don’t do it.
• Most live and learn, but by the time most learn, it is too late to live.
• Most citizens are in two minds about traffic wardens: whether they should be taken out and shot at dawn, or at dusk.
• Music is Inspiration & Sentiment. These goods cannot be sold but only shared. - Blue White Stripes
• My body may be broken, but my spirit still fights on.
• My karma ran over your dogma. (Tupac Shakur)
• My mechanics so good, if he cant fix it, it ain't broken.
• My other badge is enamel.
• Money is worthless unless some people have it and others do not.
• Mr. Heinz would be happy!!!

N

• Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark; professionals built the Titanic.
• Never Drink and drive, you might spill your beer.
• Never forget that your tools were made by the lowest bidder.
• Never forgive, never forget.
  • Quoted in Codex: Dark Angels Warhammer 40K
• Never look a gift horse in the mouth.
• Never count a tiger’s teeth before breakfast.
• Never put off doing till tomorrow what you can put off doing today.
• Ninety-nine percent of all statistics are made up on the spot (including this one).
• No brain, more pain.
• No good deed goes unpunished. —Mick Jager.
• No man is an island in Manhattan.
• No pain, no gain.
• No quarter given, and none received.
• Nobody ever said that life is fair.
• Nobody's perfect. I'm Nobody. Therefore, I must be perfect.
• Nothing is more certain than the certainty of being uncertain.
  • Possibly Pliny the Elder
  • Possibly Socrates, on being called the wisest of all men by the oracle at Delphi
  • Possibly John F. Kennedy
• Nothing is impossible. possibly a variation of the Bible verse Luke 1:37 "For with God, Nothing shall be impossible"?
• Nothing like a ciggarette to remind you you're alive
• Nothing is troublesome that we do willingly.
• Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.
• Nothing is fool proof.
• Nothing to excess. (Ancient Greek?)

O

• Obstacles are weights that when time flows, you'll get used to (from Arvin James F. Berin)
• One shot, one kill.(not the slogan of the U.S. Marines)
• One good turn deserves another.
• One knows self, knows all.
• One cannot write feelings when not in despair.
• Out of the frying pan, into the fire. (English proverb from J.R.R. Tolkien's "The Hobbit" - a chapter name, also attributed to the protagonist, Bilbo Baggins)
• One smart man is dumber than 7 seven stupid ones.
• Only the man who stands can get knocked down with pride.
• Open minds and empty heads are not the same.
• Oh what a stink of the rot!
• Optimist is the one who thinks bullshit is a fertilizer.

P

• Pain is weakness leaving the body. Variation: Pleasure is weakness entering the body.
• Pain is ever present, but never ever lasting.
• Pain is temporary. Chicks dig scars. Glory is forever.
  • From The Replacements, said by Keanu Reeves.
• Pain is your friend; It lets you know that you're still alive.
  • From GI Jane
• Patience is a very tedious virtue
  • Variant: Patience is a virtue, albeit a tedious one.
• People only think I'm wrong because my path of logic is illogical to every logical person.
• People in your life will come and go like the ocean tides, but few will leave such an imprint on your soul that it can not be washed away.
• People say I shouldn't frown because it uses more muscles than smiling. Then I point out that Americans need their exercise.
• People too weak to follow their own dreams will always find a way to discourage others.
• People who run aren't cowards, just smarter then those who charge.
• People who charge are people we remember for being excellent
• Pessimist's definition of an Optimist: Someone who knows today is so bad, tomorrow has just got to be better.
• Pessimists are just realistic optimists.
  • Variant: Pessimists are Optimists with experience.
• Perfection is only possible within an imperfect human mold.
• Perfect paranoia is perfect awareness.
• Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned.
• Pink pills for pale people.
• Patriotism - There are people in every country who shamelessly hide their corrupt practises and sheer incompetence behind their country's flag.
  • Quoted in Dennett, Daniel C. (2006). Breaking the Spell: Religion as a Natural Phenomenon (1st ed. ed.). Viking Penguin. pp. p. 17. ISBN 0-670-03472-X.
• Physical prowess is for cowards; a little pain builds character.
• Power is the ability not to have to please.
• Power is the way to fulfill absolute corruption and greed.
• Practice does not make perfect. Perfect practice makes perfect.
• Practice makes perfect, and nothings perfect, so why practice?
  • Practice makes permanent.
  • Practice makes better!
• Practice may make perfect, but perfection does not mean you don't need to practice.
• Practice what you preach.
• Pray for what you want. Work for what you need.
• Preference is vanity.
• Procrastinate later.
• Promotion is one's growth at the cost of another. - Unhappy staff
• Proper preparation prevents piss-poor performance. - The 6 p's
  • Variant: proper planning and preparation prevents piss-poor performance. - The 7 p's
• Put your Crocodile in adventure mode. - Attributed to Trik Flite

Q

• Quick action in emergencies saves lives, push up to the front of the line.
• Question everything, accept nothing.
  • Quoted by Ethan Skyler; used in 2002 in reference to Galileo, para 9 [1]
• Question it if it's free.
• Quotation is a serviceable substitute for wit; adaptation, even more so.

R

• Reach for the stars, or you'll never touch the sky.
• Real programmers don't comment their code. If it was hard to write it should be hard to understand.
• Realists are just pessimists looking for an excuse for themselves.
• Reality is a poor substitute for my dreams.
• Reality is for people who can't handle drugs.
  • Variation of "Reality is a crutch for people who can't handle drugs" —Lily Tomlin.
• Remember, people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold--but so does a hard-boiled egg.
• Remember the Alamo!
• Right or Wrong is always dependent on the context.
• Rome wasn't built in a day.
• Rule 31: There is no such thing as excessive firepower. There is only open fire and reload.

S

• Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life. -Brooke Shields
• Satisfaction is the death of desire.
• Satisfaction come at the cost of desire.
• Say what you mean, mean what you say.
• Say something wise and your name will live forever.
• Say something stupid and your name will be remembered for forever and a day.
• Scientific progress goes "Boink" (Bill Watterson, "Calvin and Hobbes" comic strip)
• Some say knowledge is the best virtue, I say stupidity is
• See ya, wouldn't wanna be ya.
• See ya later, alligator! After a while, crocodile! (Bill Haley and the Comets, "See ya later, Alligator", ca. 1957)
• See you some other never.
• Seeing is believing.
• Seek and you shall find.
• Self do, self have.
• Shit happens.
  • Shift happens.
  • Stuff happens.
  • Santa happens.
• Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you will still be among the stars.
  • Attributed to "Les Brown" (specific person not identified)
• Shop 'til you drop!
• Should have, would have, could have but didn't.
• Simple programming languages are bad because they are easy.
• Sit down, and shut up! (-South Park)
• Coulda, woulda, Shoulda.
• Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak?
  • Possibly Steven Wright
• So close, and yet so far away.
• Some people are born lucky, some make their own luck.
• Someday we will look back on this and laugh.
• Sometimes, it just takes a pirate to get the job done.
• Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me.
• Stupid people shouldn't breed.
• Smart people make problems in the world, stupid people fix them.
• Stupidity is permanent; ignorance can be fixed.
• Superficially, an aphorist is a bit like a philatelist, only he’ll never admit it.
• Support your right to arm bears.

T

• This Christmas, buy your children glue. (Arguably W H Smiths)
• Take a lesson from the whale; the only time he gets speared is when he raises to spout.
• Talent does what it can; genius does what it must.
• Talk is cheap when the story's good.
• Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.
  • Attributed to Elvis Costello as quoted in White, Timothy (October 1983). "A Man out of Time Beats the Clock". Musician (60): p. 52. ISSN 0733-5253.
  • Quoted by Laurie Anderson in "Home of the Brave" video (Warner, 1986), who attributed it to Steve Martin, as cited in Russell, Mark (January 1997). Out of Character: Rants, Raves, and Monologues from Today's Top Performance Artists. New York: Bantam. ISBN 0553374850.
  • Attributed to Thelonious Monk in Chuck Suber, editor, ed (c. 2002). Quotations for Artists, Performers, Managers & Entrepreneurs (4th revised edition ed.). Chicago: Arts, Entertainment & Media Management Publications. ISBN 0929911067.
  • Also attributed to Martin Mull, Frank Zappa, Clara Schumann, and many others
    • Origins discussed in Schumacher, Mary Louise (July 20, 2003). "A question, a mystery". The Milwaukee Journal Sentinel. Retrieved on 2006-11-10.
    • Sources analyzed in Scott, Alan P. (c. 1996). "Talking about music is like dancing about architecture". Cynical Biped. (personal website). Retrieved on 2006-11-10.
  • Many variations exist, using variations on phrases like "Writing about music", "Writing about art", and "talking about architecture"
• Tall trees catch more wind (a Dutch saying)
• Temptation is seen from a distance never near.
• The apotheosis of nihilism is suicide.
• The average girl would rather have beauty than brains because she knows the average guy can see better than he can think.
• The beatings will continue until morale improves.
• The best defense against logic is ignorance.
• The best friends you will ever have are the ones who are there when everything is not perfect.
• The best prophet of the future is the past.
• The best thing to give to your enemy is forgiveness; to an opponent, tolerance; to a friend, your heart; to your child, a good example; to a father, deference; to your mother, conduct that will make her proud of you; to yourself, respect; to all men, charity.
• The world isn't perfect...but that's why it's beautiful.
• The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of an expanding bureaucracy.-Oscar Wilde
• The customer is always right, except when he's dead wrong.
• The death of three civilians and a dog causes uproar and sadness. The death of 20,000 soldiers causes dissatisfaction.
• The devil makes work for idle thumbs.
  • Variation: The devil makes work for idle hands.
• The devil we know is better than the devil we don't.
• The devil's greatest trick was convincing the world that he didn't exist.
  • A variation is stated in the Motion Picture: "The Usual Suspects"
• The devil's greatest trick was convincing the world that God exists.

• The Eclectic Rede: Keep What Works, Fix What's Broke, Dump the Rest.
• The eternal triangle.
• The family that prays together stays together.
• The First Impression Is Not The Last Impression, But A Lasting Impression
• The first victim of anger is the angry man.
• The graffito’s on the wall!
• The hardest thing to raise in my garden is my knees.
• The glass is neither half-full nor half-empty; the glass is twice as big as it should be.
• The goal of science is to build better mousetraps. The goal of nature is to build better mice.
• The greatest thing you'll ever learn, is just to love and be loved in return.
• The greatest trick a writer ever played upon his readers was to convince them that he was telling the truth when he wrote, “Honestly, I tell you no lies!”
• The impossible is always possible.
• The line between what is right and what is wrong is thin and indistinct. It takes true character to discern between the two.
• The meaning of life is anything you want it to be, because if something hasn't got an answer how can you answer be wrong?
• The more you sweat in training, the less you bleed in battle.
• The one that can describe feelings best is the one without emotion.
• The only tme the music is too loud is when your ears start bleeding.
• The only concealed weapon is a man's mind,
• The only lesson history has taught us is that man has not yet learned anything from history.
  • Has been attributed to George Bernard Shaw
• The only problem with subtlety is that it is too subtle.
• The only thing in life achieved without effort is failure.
• The only time you have too much fuel is when you are on fire.
  • Helicopter pilot wisdom
• The only perfect lie is one that even the liar don't know the answer to.
  • Variable: The perfect lie is one that can even deceive the liar.
• The problem with society is that one man can achieve more than a thousand others.
• The proof of the pudding is in the eating.
• The straw that broke the camel's back.
• The sincerest love is satirized by the sincerest liars. (Zachary Robertson)
• The sun shines brighter in the wake of tragedy. (K.H)
• The thinner the book, the thicker the person.
• The things we remember best are those better forgotten.
• The thing our parents' generation doesn't get, is that if you kick ass on the internet, people will find you.ew.
• The whole is greater than the sum of the parts.
• The world is big again. (after the retirement of the Concorde)
• The world would be less violent if everyone used hula hoops. (mikey way)
• The WAY I walk is the WAY. (George Ly)
• There are only 3 truths in this world: My truth, your truth and THE TRUTH
• There are only 10 types of people in the world; those who understand binary and those who don't.
• There are three types of people in this world: the ones who can count, and those who can't.
• There are three types of people in this world: the ones who keep you alive, the ones who would otherwise cause you to die, and the ones who somehow manage to do both at the same time.
• There are three types of people in the world: Those who get things done, those who watch things getting done, and those who wonder what's going on.
• There are two types of people in the world: Chuck Norris and people that suck.
• There are two types of people in the world: Those who sort people into different categories, and those who don't.
• There are two types of people in the world; the people who control it, and the people that should.
• There are two types of people that go around beardless; boys and women, and I am neither.
• There is a fine line between coincidence and fate.
• There is a fine line between stupid and clever - This is Spinal Tap
• There is always one more idiot than you counted on.
• There is no I in team, unless you spell it that way.
• There is no I in team, but there is in win, and there's a u in suck.
• There is no need to fear the dead. Only fear the living.
• There is nothing that you can't do, only things that you want to or not.
• There is something about a cupboard that makes a skeleton terribly restless.
• They would have failed if they were on Expert.
• Think of it this way, in a 1000 years who's gonna care? - The Terminator
• Think of the Web as a big bathroom wall. And everyone has a marker.
• Those who don't make decisions never make mistakes.
• Those who fight and run away, live to fight another day.
• Those who reject advice are those who need it the most.
• Those who say that violence is the answer never understood the question.
• Those who say that violence isn't the answer understood the question.
• Those who suppress freedom always do so in the name of law and order.
• Thoughts don't hurt, actions do.
• Time flies like the wind, but fruit flies like bananas. - Groucho Marx
• Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana. But what are timeflies and why do they like an arrow?
• Time flies when you're having fun.
• Time files when you don't care about it.
• Times change, and we change with them.
• Togetherness only through crisis.
• To ignore the past is to jeopardize the future.
• To live, is to die.
• To refuse praise is to seek praise twice.
• Too much phone sex will give you hearing AIDS.
• Treat a person as he is, and he will remain as he is. Treat him as he could be, and he will become what he should be.
• Treat criticism as your friend.
• True power comes from knowledge. Knowledge comes from understanding.
• Take control of your own destiny.
• They condemn what they do not understand.
• Trust God, check all others.
• The Law of Gravity states that what comes up, must come down. That's why I don't invest in the Stock Market.
• There's no smoke without fire.
• Turnabout is fair play.
• The next best thing to playing and winning is playing and losing.
• The best and worst thing about Time is that it passes by. [Aditya Pastaria].
• Those most willing to give others a piece of their mind can least afford to do so.
• The difference between successful and unsuccesful man is not the lack of strength or knowledge, it's the lack of WILL POWER.
• Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do. (T.H)
• To forget is disgraceful, to forgive is true strength.
• To care for things when others don't care, that's what makes you human.

U

• Understanding someone is better than words sometimes.
• Underpromise and overdeliver.

V

• Violence/War is not the answer.
• Violence isn't the answer, but it's a bloody good guess.

W

• Wars are where old men talk and young men die.
• Wars are always fought for old men by young boys.
  • Likely to be a variant of a Herodotus quote.
• We fucked that midget, Sam. Fucked'em all nite long, and not just traditional. Blargy
• We all have wings. Heaven is just VIP.
• We are not meant to be good, we are just meant to exist. - Attributed to Trik Flite
• We will fight them until hell freezes over. Then, we'll fight them on ice. - Dutch Meyer
• Whatever happens for a reason, happens. - Marie Abigail Pineda
• What drives you? Is it a Mini or a Thunderbird?
• Whatever you do, do cautiously, and look to the end.
• What is popular is not always right; what is right is not always popular.
• What's the officer problem?
• When you meet a stranger, give them a smile. It may be the only sunshine they see all day.
  • Attributed by some to Wilson Mizner (1876-1933)
• When the going gets tough, America goes to the bar.
• When the shit hits the fan, and osama bin laden is found, when there is a snowball fight in hell, and animal control has to buy planes to catch the pigs in the sky, that's when I might consider listening to whatever the hell it is you're saying.
  • thought to be bob smith
• When your father says "Do I look stupid?", don't answer.
• When someone says they don't care it means they care very much.
• Where patience fails, force prevails.
• Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right.
• Who ever said nothings impossible obviously never tried slamming a revolving door.
• Whom the gods wish to destroy, they first make mad.
  • Greek proverb, 5th century BCE or earlier. Often misattributed by recent writers to Euripides; the misattribution seems to date to the mid-to-late 20th century. The earliest variant is a paraphrase in Sophocles' Antigone, lines 620ff. See Euripides for a full list of variants and paraphrases. The most pithy ancient variant is that of Publilius Syrus (qv.).
  • Variant: Whom gods destroy they first make mad.
  • Widely quoted variant in Latin (but not dating to antiquity): quem Iuppiter vult perdere dementat prius ("Whom Jupiter wishes to destroy he first sends mad").
• Whom the gods would destroy they first make mad—but they don't bother about the working classes.
• Why be difficult when you can be impossible?
• Why bother making cookies if your just going to shit them out?
• Why buy the cow when the milk is free?
• Why buy it when you can build it for twice as much.
• Why do you try to fit in when you are born to stand out?
• Wikipedia has changed the way the world gets information forever.
• Winners never quit, and quitters never win.
• Without education, we are in horrible and deadly danger of taking educated people seriously.
• Wise men make proverbs. Fools repeat them.
• Wise men speak because they have something to say, fools speak because they have to say something.
• Women can fake orgasms, men can fake the whole relationships.
  • Possibly from Sharon Stone
• Where there's smoke there's fire.
• Where there's smoke, they pinch back.
• Whos been stealing my icecreams.
• Write a wise saying and your name will live forever.

X

• Xenophobia is alien to me.
• Xylophones are like humans – there can be all kinds of notes and personalities.

Y

• You can choose your friends, but you can't choose your enemies.
• You can fool all of the people some of the time, and some of the people all of the time, but you can't fool all of the people all of the time.
  • Attributed to P. T. Barnum and Abraham Lincoln
• You can go off people you know.
• You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink.
• You can lead a horse to water, but a pencil must be lead.
• You can lead a horse to water, but dont fiddle with it... thats just weird.
• You can eat your cake and have it too.
  • Often stated as "You can have your cake and eat it too."
• You cannot mistake happenings as inconveniences always, you have to sit and think about how you can benefit from it. Jedediah Mehok
• You have no rights. Sit down.
• You cannot use your friends and have them too.
• You can't put a better bit of butter on you knife!
• You can’t predict the future, but you can prepare for it.
• You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your friend's nose.
• You can lead a whore to culture, but you can't make her think. –Dorothy Parker.
• You gotta move on to groove on.
• You have more luck than brains.
• You're only worth as much as you promises are.
• You know what they say, whitewater in the morning.
• You're bad bad, but he(/she) is Great! / He(/She) is not bad, but You are great! [Tony Leung]
• You're unique. Just like everyone else. -Margaret Mead
• Your village called they want their idiot back.
• Your head is not aerodynamically proportioned.
• Your last word is another man's target.

Identified postings

To be moved or added to appropriate pages.

• That's what she said! - Michael Scott in The Office. Michael Scott is a fictional character on NBC’s The Office, portrayed by Steve Carell.

• "There is no such thing as an 'inhuman act', for there is no act so vile that one cannot find a human willing, or even eager, to commit it."
  • A. G. Lyman

• Don't take life too seriously: it isn't permanent.
  • This is a variant of the original from the comic strip Pogo by Walt Kelly; Don't take life so serious, son, it ain't nohow permanent.

• … few people blame themselves, while it is in the power of self-love to twist the charge against others.
  • John Moore (1789). "Chapter XIV". Zeluco: Various Views of Human Nature.
  • Quoted in Anderson, Robert (1820). The Works of John Moore: With Memoirs of His Life and Writings, Volume V. Edinburgh: Stirling & Slade. pp. p. 117. Retrieved on 2007-11-15.
  • Variation: Few people blame themselves until they have exhausted all other possibilities.

• … I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die.
  • w:Mr. Garrison, South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut (1999); referring to menstruation
  • Spider Jerusalem w:Transmetropolitan issue number 16 (1998); a variant: "Never trust anything that bleeds for four days but doesn't die."
  • w:Neil LaBute, writer and director, w:In the Company of Men (1997); a variant: "I don't trust anything that bleeds for a week and doesn't die."
  • w:Jessie Prichard Hunter, Blood Music (1993); a variant: "One time this guy told me he didn't trust women because he could never trust anything that bleeds for five days every month and doesn't die."
  • w:Julius Alvin, Intensely Gross Jokes (1993); a variant: "How come you can't trust a woman? Who could trust someone who bleeds for five days but doesn't die."

• I, the righteous man in desperate sorrow set fire to myself
  • From the Drakontospilos cave in St. John Trypate at Karyes village in Khios Island - Greece

• Insanity is inherited. You get it from your kids.
  • w:Erma Bombeck

• Eels up inside ya!
  • The Hitcher (The Mighty Boosh)

• I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum.
  • Nada (Roddy Piper) in They Live

• If you can't dazzle them with your intelligence, baffle them with your bullshit.
  • From Book of the SubGenius

• It's better to be a lion for a day than a sheep all your life.
  • Attributed to Sister Elizabeth Kenny by DailyCelebrations.com

• It's not the fall that kills you — it's the sudden stop at the end.
  • From the French movie La Haine
  • Also from Chronicles of Riddick Escape of the Butcher Bay (Riddick)

• Jesus is coming, look busy.
  • Tattooed on the bottom of the fake Archbishop of Canterbury in the movie Johnny English
  • Also appears on various T-shirts, and also on an episode of The Simpsons

• Laziness travels so slowly that poverty soonly overtakes him.
  • Attributed to Benjamin Franklin

• Nine women cannot deliver a baby in one month.
  • Frederick P. Brooks from his book The Mythical Man-Month: Essays on Software Engineering
  • This is very similar to a statement attributed to Wernher von Braun

• Nothing helps a bad mood like spreading it around.
  • Calvin "Calvin and Hobbes"

• Nothing is impossible, only improbable.
  • Variant ~ Nothing is impossible, only improbable. And improbable just takes a little while longer to accomplish.
  • Isn't this a variant of a quote already attributed to George Santayana?
  • Possibly from the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

• Nothing is impossible, only improbable, impractical or unfeasable.
• … once you have glimpsed the world as it might be, as it ought to be, as it's going to be (however that vision appears to you), it is impossible to live anymore compliant and complacent in the world as it is.
  • Safford, Victoria (September 2, 2004). "The Gates of Hope". TheNation.com. Retrieved on 2006-11-16.

• Optimists are badly informed pessimists.
  • Attributed to Theo Maassen

• Repeat after me, we are all individuals.
  • Source: this is a derivative of a line spoken by Graham Chapman as the character Brian in Monty Python's Life of Brian. Brian is talking to a crowd of people who mistakenly believe he is the Messiah and are repeating everything he says. Brian says ...You've got to think for yourselves. You're all individuals! then the crowd shouts Yes! We're all individuals! (This may not be the original source of this quote.)
  • Steve Martin also used a derivative of this phrase in his stand up comedy routine back in the 1970s. It was part of some oath he asked the audience to recite with him. There was also something about being obsequious and clairovoyant. Flypaper of the mind, I know.

• So long as a man remains free, he strives for nothing so incessantly and so painfully as to find someone to worship.
  • Paraphrase/alternate translation of Fyodor Dostoevsky, in The Brothers Karamazov: Man, so long as he remains free, has no more constant and agonising anxiety than find as quickly as possible someone to worship.

• Strength is a necessity because there will always be conflict.
  • Gilbert Durandal, Mobile Suit Gundam SEED Destiny, PHASE-01 "Angry Eyes"

• The deepest circle of hell is reserved for betrayers and mutineers.
  • Captain Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp) in Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)
  • Alludes to Dante's The Divine Comedy (1321), but not an actual quote
  • Mentioned in Angel (1999–2004; unidentified episode)

• The turtle only advances by sticking its neck out.
  • Les Reimers

• There are only 2 people in this world who I trust — One is me and the other isn't you.
  • Cameron Poe (Nicholas Cage) to US Marshall Vince Larkin (John Cusack) in Con Air (1997)

• When you assume, you make an "ass" out of "u" and "me".
  • One well-known instance is from The Odd Couple, "My Strife in Court" [3.19], first aired 16 February 1973, spoken by Felix Unger (with a chalkboard illustration)

• You can agree to disagree on politics or even religion sometimes but you either kill people or you don't. Homicide is not something you can be neutral on.
  • Anita Blake (fictional character from a book series by L. K. Hamilton)

• Don't eat that yellow snow
  • Frank Zappa

• Your mind is like a parachute, it works better when its open.
  • Frank Zappa

• Youth is wasted on the young.
  • George Bernard Shaw

• You can't push on a string.

• Rule #1 : The customer is always right. Rule # 2 : If the customer is wrong, refer to rule #1.
  • Writer Anne Brashares in her book FOur girls and a jean. One of the characters.

• There are millions of planets in the universe who turn around millions of suns who turn around millions of galaxies who turn around one point. And that point isn't you!
  • Kira Hart on TV show Reba (Scarlette Pomers).
  • Attributed to John Maynard Keynes by Varian, Hal R. (June 5, 2003). "Dealing with Deflation". The New York Times. Retrieved on 2007-01-11.

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